If You’re Looking For My Heart

I don’t know if you even care though you’re sittin’ with me here With me at this bowling alley bar and you just ordered me a cold beer I’m not used to forward women But before we even start It’s been thrown in the trash If you’re looking for my heart It’s been thrown inContinue reading “If You’re Looking For My Heart”

I’m No Garth Brooks, But…

I’m tired of Standing Outside The Fire Thinkin’ of That Summer & That Ol’ Wind And I’ve been sick of Burning Bridges and Unanswered Prayers again and again I might be goin’ Against The Grain now but I want to be your only Mr. Right For that’s when We Shall Be Free Cause we’ll findContinue reading “I’m No Garth Brooks, But…”

Maybe It’s Just My Boner

When I was younger than I am now I’d get erections all the time In classrooms and bathrooms The feeling was very sublime So it’s weird now that I’m older ‘Cause my dick doesn’t go up much these days Even when I’m not attracted to the girl it decides to go against my heart andContinue reading “Maybe It’s Just My Boner”

Normal Christmas

Do you remember when Christmas was Christmas with your brothers, sisters, Mom and Dad? When you exchanged good wishes and presents and the best family times ever were had? When nobody had special dietary needs and everybody wanted to be there? When there wasn’t a single argument? When we lived our lives without a care?Continue reading “Normal Christmas”

She Murdered Me

We met through a personal advertisement In a local entertainment publication After a few dates she invited me to Come with her on a two-week vacation It was all inclusive at a resort in Mexico And it included an overnight cruise Little did I know on that boat It was my life that I wouldContinue reading “She Murdered Me”

When She Laughs at Me

We’re out on our date together It’s a sweet Saturday night She looks so marvelous And all with us feels right Then I think about everything The intimacy and romance We don’t have to cut a rug But do when we get the chance We might just talk in the backyard Or take a smallContinue reading “When She Laughs at Me”

All I Need Now is the Fish (Here Fishy, Fishy, Fishy)

Out on this fishin’ boat this mornin’ Wearin’ this bright orange vest Spent yesterday preparin’ Last night I got plenty of rest Got my Ugly Stick rod and reel My Folgers can is filled with bait Just loaded my Eagle Claw hook Cast my line, and now I wait All I need now is theContinue reading “All I Need Now is the Fish (Here Fishy, Fishy, Fishy)”