Adult Themes, Cabaret, Growing Up, Inspired by a Place, Introspective, Jazz, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Relationships, Unrequited, Wistful, Young Love

Dead Inside

Dead inside
That’s how I turned out
Dead inside
I don’t know what I’m about
I have no idea how I got this way
But here you are asking me today

If I remember a time when I felt well
But I promised I would never ever tell

I cannot unpack all those feelings
Locked so deep inside of me
I hear them rumble and they tumble
No one ever helped me find the key
It sunk like an old pirate’s chest
Somewhere in the middle of the sea
The younger me is chained to it, and
couldn’t figure out how to break free

Dead inside
He’s just a kid and nobody knew
Dead inside
No one can rescue him, not even you
I have no idea if anything you say
Will break the chains, rusted & gray

I know I blocked a time when I felt well
I gave my word I would never ever tell

I cannot unpack all those feelings
Locked so deep inside of me
I hear them rumble and they tumble
No one ever helped me find the key
It sunk like an old pirate’s chest
Somewhere in the middle of the sea
The younger me is chained to it, and
Died trying desperately to break free

He’s dead inside
He’s a part of who I’ve become
Dead inside
It’s OK to me if I’m forever numb
I have idea why I need to sit & talk
I’d rather wander alone on the Boardwalk

It’s where I discovered I wasn’t well
And then remembered I shouldn’t tell

I wanna unpack all those feelings
Locked so deep inside of me
And they rumble and they tumble
I’ve been looking for the silver key
That sunk like an old pirate’s chest
Somewhere in the middle of the sea
Meanwhile the older me is out here
And what’s dead inside
What’s dead inside
Is the dream of what she and I
Will never in our lifetime be

January 15, 2019

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About Family, Adult Themes, Autobiographical, Folk Ballad, Growing Up, Inspired by College, Introspective, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Nostalgia, Rites of Passage, Wistful

Beach in Seabright

I look at our kids
I look at my wife
I think to myself
What a wonderful life

We have a house
A couple of cars
I feel so grateful
as I stare at the stars

And I know time is moving
faster than I’d like
I know it’s been a while since
I’ve been on my bike
I also know all of this
is what I’d dream about
As I’d head out with my friends
night after night
Searching for the one
with sweetness and light
At bars nearby
the beach in Seabright

I didn’t see her comin’
but I fell hard & fast
I was confident & cool
Prayin’ we would last

And I sure as hell got lucky
We’ve now been together for so long
When I think we’re gonna break up
I discover I’m so, so wrong

And I know time is moving
faster than desired
II know it’ll be a while
before we’re retired
I also know all of this
is what I hoped for as a teen
As I’d go out with my friends
on Saturday nights
Looking for more
than sweetness and light
At those bonfires on
the beach in Seabright

I look at our kids
and who I’ve become
I didn’t end up where
Mom & Dad were from

This journey I’m on
with my loving family
is the best damn thing
That’s happened to me

And I know time is moving
faster than I’d like
It’s been a while since
I’ve ridden that bike
I also know all of this is
all I’d ever need or want
Someday I’ll take them all to
that yacht harbor restaurant
Where I’d admire everyone
with sweetness and light
who grew up like me at
that beach in Seabright

Who grew up like me at
that beach in Seabright

December 27, 2018

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Adult Themes, Autobiographical, Country Song, Inspired by People, Introspective, Love, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Optimism, Relationships, Romance

I Don’t Worry Now

I used to worry about when I’d find true love
But I have you, so I don’t worry now
I used to worry about the job I wanted badly
But I have you, so I don’t worry now

I used to be so concerned
about the lessons I learned
About what I would wear
to get people to stare
But I’m not like that anymore
as long as I have a key
that unlocks our house
Life’s no sweat for me
and I don’t worry now

I used to worry about when I’d make it big
But you love me, so I don’t worry now
I used to worry about if I was enough
I’m enough for you, so I don’t worry now

I used to be so preoccupied
Buckets of tears I have cried
About those I loved and lost
My heart froze like Autumn frost
But I’m not hopeless anymore
As long as you’re by my side
I won’t ever have to doubt
’cause together we’re on this ride
Babe, you’re my life,
You’re what I’m all about
You’re my sweetheart
and I don’t worry now

You’re my sweetheart
and I don’t worry now

November 27, 2018

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Adult Themes, Americana, Blues, Inspired by a Place, Introspective, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Nostalgia, Piano Song, Wistful

The Regular

Well, I’m a regular at the Lucca Grill
Where I order the same thing every week
A Ham and Pineapple Calzone & a Coke
And they listen to me even when I’m bleak

I don’t have many friends around anymore
My ex-wife took the kids away from me
So I go there to check in & shoot the breeze
And they always test my long term memory

What was it like in the old days here old man?
They ask me and I always answer honestly
It was not like it is now – it was much better
It’s where I wish I was stuck for eternity
The people were much friendlier and open
It was so much fun, everyone had so much class
We all respected the older Gentlemen and Ladies
And we’d go have breakfast after Sunday Mass

And I see the happiness in their smoky eyes
As they listen to me with interest and intent
Before you know it, I’m there until supper time
And I wonder where all the time went

And I go home to feed my beagle Theodore
I sit down and ponder all the things I said
After my supper from a cardboard box,
I put on my PJ’s, then slowly climb into bed

And I think about those Spring weekends
We’d spend up in Chicago at the nightclubs
We’d dance the Lindy and East Coast Swing
How I deeply miss that ol’ pal of mine Buzz
We’d stay up and talk about random things
Maybe swap a few lies about this and that
Back when ladies wore fancy dresses daily
And I’d be dressed to the nines with a hat

So whenever you see me at the Lucca Grill
Come on over to my table, we’ll have a drink
I’d love to know more about you all
How you’re doing and what you feel & think

Maybe I could be of use to you as I listen
To your stories & what’s going on with you
I’m pretty good at figuring out solutions
And there’s not much else now I can do

What was it like in the old days here old man?
You’ll ask me and I’ll always answer honestly
It was not like it is now – it was much better
It’s where I wish I was stuck for eternity
The people were much friendlier and open
It was so much fun, everyone had so much class
We all respected the older Gentlemen and Ladies
And we’d go have breakfast after Sunday Mass

We all respected each other’s hopes and dreams
And we’d go have breakfast after Sunday Mass

October 30, 2018

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Adult Themes, Autobiographical, Creativity Themes, Folk Ballad, Growing Up, Inspired by High School, Inspired by People, Introspective, Love, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Nostalgia, Relationships, Romance, Unrequited, Wistful

Crushing Crush

There’s a girl I’ve known since I was seventeen
Has an aquatic blue eye and another that’s green
She’s not the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen
but she’s the one I was crushing on back then

I was dating others who were nothing like her
Whether they liked me or not, I wasn’t that sure
What I do know is I was lonely, awkward & immature
and she was the one I was crushing on back then

She was told I was obsessing from a friend of a friend
We hung out for lunch when her heart was on the mend
and I shared with her a poem I had recently penned
before she became the one I was crushing on back then

Last I heard she moved to Jersey with a guy who she met
while they were still in college, now he’s a Navy Vet
And I wish I could erase that memory I just can’t forget
of the moment I found out she only dated older men
How I was crushed by the one I was crushing on back then
How I was crushed by the one I was crushing on back then

October 23, 2018

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Inspired by People, Introspective, Love, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Nostalgia, Relationships, Romance, Wistful, Women, Young Love

From April to August

We were only together
From April to August
From Spring thru Summer
She was fine, She was mine

We’d hit the dive bars
And the record shops
From Spring thru Summer
I was her fan and her man

Sometime after Labor Day
She said she was movin’ away
Her father got a job up North somewhere
I told her to write or call
I never heard from her at all
It was a gloomy Fall – life felt so unfair
I didn’t buy the thought that she didn’t care

Cause she took something of mine as a souvenir
It was my favorite gray hoodie from my Senior year
And she gifted me this beat up Martin six string
But when I play it, I don’t feel a goddamn thing
All I wanna do now is go back in time to Spring
On that Seattle night when we made out to Sting
Those weeks we were together from April to August
Stole all my desire for anyone else and wanderlust
Stole all my desire for anyone else and wanderlust

We had only dated
From April to August
Trips to Capitola
We held hands, saw cool bands

We’d go watch the ocean
We’d go mountain biking
From Spring to Summer
Drank barley wine, It was divine

Sometime after Labor Day
She said she was movin’ away
Her father got a job up North somewhere
I told her to write or call
I never heard from her at all
It was a gloomy Fall – life felt so unfair
I didn’t buy the thought that she didn’t care

Cause she took something of mine as a souvenir
It was my college ring I bought my Senior year
She gifted me this beat up Martin six string
But when I play it, I don’t feel a goddamn thing
All I wanna do now is go back in time to June
On that night when we kissed under the moon
Those weeks we were together from April to August
Stole all my desire for anyone else and wanderlust
Stole all my desire for anyone else and wanderlust

October 14, 2018

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About Family, Country Song, Growing Up, Inspired by High School, Inspired by People, Introspective, Lyrics, No Music Yet, Nostalgia, Optimism, Relationships, Rites of Passage, Romance, Women, Young Love

She’s Datin’ a Bad Boy

Her grades began to slip
from A’s & B’s to C’s & D’s
Her current choice of schoolboy
won’t give her fond memories
He’s been makin’ her feel guilty
He don’t respect her one bit
He’s a cocky lil’ sumbitch
Born to end up a misfit

She’s datin’ a bad boy
Oh, he’s not gonna be Mister Right
Ah, but she don’t know any different
so she loves him with all her might
She’s datin’ a greaseball
And he knows she’s outta his league
Cause he can’t help bein’ a bad boy
and she can’t help bein’ intrigued

Up nightly on her phone
maybe one day she’ll learn
Instead of taking care of her
He’ll go and never return
Maybe they’ll end up with a baby
and another one on the way
Then he’ll pick a fight & take off
but she’ll be wishin’ he’d stay

She’s datin’ a bad boy
Oh, he’s never gonna be “The One”
You can see it right in his icy eyes
He’ll eventually cut and run
She’s datin’ a scumbag
And he knows he don’t deserve her
Cause he can’t help bein’ a runner
They could be like her Mom & I were…

Bridge:
Maybe she thinks he’s a fixer-upper
Maybe he’ll change his reckless ways
Maybe she knows he’s just actin’ out
and he’s just goin’ through a phase
They could get thru all the hardships
Maybe they’ll learn from their mistakes
Guess I should just be there for her
Just in case her young heart breaks

She’s growin’ up and can date him
It’s not worth a damaging fight
Who am I to meddle with the little man
He’s someone like me who holds her tight
Maybe under all that stuff he wears
right down to the familiar Converse shoes
He’s no crazy tattooed biker dude
and I’m pickin’ up on all the wrong clues

She’s told me to stay out of it
so that’s what I’m gonna do
This bad boy turned Dad of hers knows
he’s got a lot to live up to

This bad boy turned Dad of hers knows
the inner pain that kid is goin’ through

She’s datin’ a bad boy…

October 6, 2018

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