Halloween in Haddonfield

Parents go out and leave their kids at home With hot looking babysitters who mess around Their boyfriends arrive when the kids are asleep And they try not to make any big sounds Maybe they decided to watch a scary movie Maybe they’re drinkin’ beer n gettin” high They’re likely dry humpin’ in the familyContinue reading “Halloween in Haddonfield”

The Emigrant Gap Bandit

See, If you could step right into my shoes You would know why I am this way You would know my complete story Why I’m in this Reno jailhouse today If you could see what I’ve been through If you could live where I was raised If you could step right into my shoes YouContinue reading “The Emigrant Gap Bandit”

Ballad of Sugar Booger & Ellie Mae

She called him Sugar Booger‘n he didn’t mind one bitHe wasn’t rich or very poorHe was heavier ‘n not so fit They got along like best friendsGrew closer with each passing dayYeah, she called him Sugar Boogerand her name was Ellie Mae Ellie Mae had golden curly locks, ‘nsweeter than German Chocolate CakeShe loved houseworkContinue reading “Ballad of Sugar Booger & Ellie Mae”

They Might Be Townies

When we’re at Starbucks Talking about our lives We’re surrounded by Husbands and wives Of people we work with or know That’s not what concerns me the most The trouble is, they might be townies and they’re standing too close They could be listening to us And telling their friends & families What we sayContinue reading “They Might Be Townies”

I Know What You Did In High School

I know what you did in High School I know who you really were You were filled with gallant bravado But you were also very immature You made fun of everyone behind their backs and you fondled almost all of those girls I know what you did in High School You stole my Mom’s freshwaterContinue reading “I Know What You Did In High School”

Whistling Dixie in the Dark

Out by where we used to go trout fishing Beyond the valley, we hiked to get there As soon as the scent of pine hit our noses we thought we had no reason to despair We set up camp and get a small fire going ’cause it would be freezing out by sundown And weContinue reading “Whistling Dixie in the Dark”