Mama He’s Not Right

Well, I got off early from my dead end job
And I headed to my girl’s parents’ place
And they didn’t hear me let myself in
I heard her sister state her case

Mama, he’s not right
Something’s wrong with that guy
I heard he gets drunk and high
Don’t you turn a blind eye
Don’t let her out of the house tonight
Mama he may be polite
But I’ve heard sis and him fight
His beater car is a pigsty
I think he only has a clip on tie
Ohhhh, Mama, he’s not right

So I quietly let myself out
And I went to the local pub
It was Thirsty Thursday
I was ready for beers n grub

Sure enough, there she was
My girl and some biker dude
She said “Oh he’s just a friend”
And “You’ve ruined my mood”

And I said
Baby, he’s not right
Something’s wrong with that guy
He’s already drunk and high
He’s givin’ me the stink eye
Don’t go home with him tonight
Baby, he don’t look polite
And he sure wants to fight
His home is likely a pigsty
He likely don’t own a tie
Ohhhh baby, he’s not right

Then I found myself in a big pickle
One that forever changed my life
I was gonna have to alter things
If I was gonna attract a potential wife

So she’d say
Mama, he’s just so right
He’s a bit flawed but good guy
He doesn’t get drunk or high
In fact he has an artistic eye
And she’d be home every night
We’d make up after each fight
Even if our place was a pigsty
And I had a few nice ties
I’m sick of them sayin’
That I ain’t right

I wanna be that good man
Whose wife is hugging tight
And when we’re under the sheets
We’d explode like fireworks & dynomite

And she’ll say
Mama, you’re wrong,
For me, he’s very, very right.

August 15, 2018


Cooler By The Lake

She just got back to school that week
She was in her third year at Wesleyan
It wasn’t as easy as school used to be
So she wasn’t having as much fun
Ran into her old flame at the Pub II
He was distant and didn’t talk a lot
But when she closed her eyes
She instantly fantasized
About the days when her ex was hot

He was cooler by the lake
They’d go out there ‘n mess around
To her it was more than a summer fling
She thought it was true love she found
And when he said they were over
She thought they’d still be friends
But knew now he was filled with lies
She was clear on her big mistake
He turned out like all those guys
Who acted cooler by the lake

So she tried to date all kinds of ways
Even though her homework was hard
She met a senior on one of her dates
She thought he was kind of a card
He was not into the whole frat scene
He liked fishin’ up at Lake Bloomington
And when he brought her
As he eagerly taught her
She wasn’t sure he was the one

He was cooler by the lake
He knew how to use his rod & reel
He used the bait on his hook that day
She didn’t know what to feel
Was this the prediction of their fate?
After all, her heart was at stake
She was in a suspicious state
’cause was cooler by the lake

It was hotter than Hades in Chi-Town
They were home during Spring Break
They decided to take a bus Downtown
Suddenly she got a raging headache
He had an idea that might help her
Not chocolate cake
Or her favorite shake
She giggled when he said to her
it’s always cooler by the lake

Oh, that day they were
both cooler by the lake
Oh, that day they were
both cooler by the lake

Cooler by the lake
Cooler by the lake
Cooler by the lake
Cooler by the lake

August 10, 2018

Oh Steubenville

It was the Summer before I started freshman year
I was invited to go on a week-long religious retreat
Thought it was neat that my church sponsored me
Maybe Jesus Christ was who I would meet

A small group including my best friend and me
Got on that jet plane and flew through the sky
And we ended up at a college campus in Ohio
It was then, when I discovered my own why

It was bright green
and it was fun
It was peaceful all around
And I loved
When we sang
I’d close my eyes
And hear the sweet harmony
I knew right then and there
On that glorious grassy hill
I’d remember those moments spent
In Steubenville, Oh, Steubenville…

Met a tall girl there who I really liked a lot
She had bright blue-green eyes and a pixie cut
Her name was Tracy, she was from Toronto, Canada
She held my hand tight and I hoped it was love

We kept in touch by mail after we both got home
But we slowly stopped writing letters as much
And when I started my awkward Freshman year
I started longing for another young girl’s touch

Who I had seen
In PE class
And I saw her
At every Sunday mass
And as we sang
I’d close my eyes
And hear the sweet harmony
I knew right then and there
It gave me a familiar thrill
It was like when I was with my friends
In Steubenville, Oh, Steubenville

It was on a December night out on the road
When he decided to pull over to take a nap
See, he’d been driving all night with a load
And in an instant, something fell into his lap

He was distracted and the ice hit his tires
He swerved, his truck wound upside down
I was asked to be a pallbearer at his funeral
So I flew out there to our humble hometown

We all wore black
I hurt inside
His Dad and Mom
and his little sister cried
But as we sang in harmony
I knew right then and there
I’d find comfort and always will
cherish all those memories we made
In Steubenville, Oh, Steubenville

It was the Summer before my Freshman year
I was invited to attend a week-long religious retreat
Thought it was neat that my church sponsored me
Maybe Jesus Christ was who I would meet
in Steubenville… Oh, Steubenville.

August 5, 2018

Lyrics Notes: In these lyrics, I explore the time I went to a Charismatic Youth Group Conference in Steubenville with a small group of High Schoolers and our Youth Group leaders. In this case, I wanted to add in a couple things. I fell for this girl there from Canada and that was pretty neat but I wanted to add something into the story that kinda brings it all together and the only thing I thought of was to add in a death of someone who went with us. This is a character but it has someone I deeply relate to… and it does reframe what happened on that trip but the idea is still the same and I look to move people and find common themes for people to relate to. It’s kind of a Christian “growing up song.” It is supposed to prompt the listener maybe into calling that person who impacted your life when you were young. Life is too short to not reach out to people who are special to you.

The Girls on the Porch

I was drivin’ my ol’ beat up truck
Down a backwoods gravel road
Right then I was really outta luck
Cause I couldn’t find a commode
Really had to unload a number two
Man I was so desperate to go
Then I found a cabin with some
Sweet southern girls on the porch

I said I hated to be a bother to them
I told ’em I knew it sounded weird
I asked if I could use their bathroom
And they would have nothin’ to fear
They looked at each other and said
Sure honey, whatcha waiting for
I was so grateful to those darling
Sweet southern girls on the porch

I was led through the kitchen
Through a hallway to the back
Was a small room for my business
It had a girly magazine rack
I was in there sittin’ ‘n waitin’
And quietly starin’ at the door
Then I heard a tender voice of
One of the girls from the porch

She asked if I needed something
Like a mason jar of cold lemonade
She said it wouldn’t be much trouble
That mornin’ it had been made
I said that sure sounded fantastic
She brought it in the bathroom to me
And she was the most beautiful girl
I ever got the pleasure to meet or see

And I sipped on that sour sugary drink
It helped me finish the job I believe
Then I washed my hands, head and face
I did what I was supposed to achieve

And as I opened the bathroom door
I heard a different voice across the hall
She asked if I’d kindly help her with
Hangin’ some pictures on her wall
They were of her and her close friends
I knew where I had seen them before
They were who I had just met those
Sweet southern girls on the porch

They knew I was traveling through but
They asked me to stay to have some food
I couldn’t believe I came upon them
They sure uplifted my spirits and mood
I couldn’t reject them, it would be rude
But I ate supper like an old racehorse
I felt so nurtured and cared for by those
Sweet southern girls on the porch

You can tell someone taught them well
’cause their hospitality was top notch
They laughed as I told my funny story
About how I ended up with my old watch

They offered me a room I could sleep in
If I was tired from the long drive I had
And I said I couldn’t stay with them
But they didn’t make me feel bad
They said I’d always be welcomed
They all were so down home ‘n warm
Oh, I never ever will forget those
Sweet southern girls on the porch

Oh I never ever will forget those
Sweet southern girls on the porch.

August 2, 2018

Lyrics Notes: As an Uber Driver in Central Illinois, I get lots of ideas for songs. I’ve been thinking and stewing on this one for a while. I saw some Illinois State girls drinking on a porch on Spring Day (they call these “Day Parties” or “Darties” for short) and I had to figure out a context. This is what came up – A simple story similar to the song “Watermelon Crawl”…  The title was inspired by “The Girls on the Beach,” by the Beach Boys – and I just connected the dots. Enjoy.

Home Cooked Chow

We’ve been out on that road
for what it seems like, years
Singin’ songs for all you people
Makin’ you laugh and cry tears
We’ve seen a lot of blacktops
and highways across this great land
But there’s been something missin’
to myself and this here band

Home cooked chow
Is what we’ve been dreamin’ about
for breakfast lunch ‘n dinner
We’re tired of all the takeout
We’ve gotta tour to make that money
But we’ve gotta get back somehow
to our homes in the dirty South
to munch down on home cooked chow

Fresh roasted coffee in a mug
with lots of sugar and cream
Pancakes, syrup and sausage
with burnt toast is a dream
Made by people who love us
when we’re not playin’ on stage
Not random fans wantin’ pictures
or a autographed CD booklet page

Home cooked chow
Is what we’ve been dreamin’ about
for breakfast lunch ‘n dinner
We’re tired of all the takeout
We’ve gotta tour to make that money
But we’ve gotta get back somehow
to our homes in the dirty South
to munch down on home cooked chow

Nothin’ against all y’all out there
We’re grateful for what we get to do
We’re enjoyin’ this tour so much
Playin’ this homegrown music for you
But you’ve gotta understand us
We’ve been out on the road so long
We’re missin’ our Southern honeys
That’s why we wrote this song

About that home cooked chow
The truck stop diners just can’t beat
Even the fanciest places out there
don’t have that delicious deer camp meat
Whether it’s biscuits and gravy
or meals that melt in your mouth
Down at our cabins in the Dirty South
We’ve gotta get there soon ya’ll
to have some yummy home cooked chow

Oh, we can’t wait to devour
all that comfort food –
that home cooked chow
that home cooked chow
that home cooked chow.

August 1, 2018

Meadow in the Moonlight

In a meadow in the moonlight
Where the rabbits fall asleep
We laid down on a blanket
And we both started to weep

For we were so grateful to be alive
A good friend of ours recently died
It was the passing of our innocence
That night our souls became tied

The stars above us were aligned
As we spoke of how we felt
And as I looked into her hazel eyes
My heart started to melt

We made a vow in the morning
That it wouldn’t change anything
It was only a temporary passion
one emotional evening in Spring

To the meadow in the moonlight
I return with high hopes every year
That she will break her promise
That she will magically appear

But deep inside I know the truth
She is long gone without regret
So with a heavy heart I go home
Knowing I will never forget.

The Proposal Song

I don’t want to love someone out of spite
I just wanna be yours, your only Mr. Right
I wanna love you dear with all of my might,
Oh, I just wanna be your man, your Mr. Right

There you are, coming up with excuses again
Sayin’ you only can be my closest friend
You don’t wanna be more than a one night stand
You just wanna cuddle and hold my hand

Well I don’t wanna get in a dishonest fight
I just wanna be the last one to say goodnight
I wantcha to know that I won’t ever bite
I gotta be the one who’s gonna hold you tight

Through every little problem that you face
In situations where you feel out of place
Though every heartbreaking family tragedy
The one I hope you’ll always count on is me

I swear I’ll do anything to make you mine
You’ll be my eternal and special Valentine
In darkness you feel, I wanna be your light
Cause you deserve the one who’s Mr. Right

And why do I think, my dear that man is me?
Oh sweetie, review our complete history
At first it seemed like such a crazy mystery
But now it’s only you, honey, that I see

If you were Mrs. Wrong, by now I’d know
I’d quit and enter another romantic rodeo
I’d end up being some woman’s Mr. Right Now
So darlin’, you’ll have to show me how

To prove to you I’m not like those other guys
Who turned you from naive to bitterly wise
It took me me years of thinkin’ every night
That it’s clear to me I’m your only Mr. Right

You’ve gotta know in your soul,
It’s a thing you cannot control
I’m your you’re destiny, your fate
I know I’m a few years late
But now I’m enlightened by foresight
The whole reason for this song
Was to tell you they’re all wrong
And we are meant to be
I’m your only Mr. Right
And I’m here to set you free

You’re my one and only Mrs. Right
I’m asking you, my dear, to marry me

July 11, 2018